"Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy." - Thich Nhat Hanh

Thursday, August 12

Blast from the past.

I thought post experts from my past blog post, so you are keyed in. Basically, it's a bunch of random talk about boys and boredom. Go figure.



"I like the starburst commercial about contradictions, I always giggle at the albino life guard."-July 22, 2009

"Then Ashley, Erin, and I ate breakfast for the first time at school; I ate cereal with a spork. It was epic."- August 10, 2009

"Oh my goodness. I want to beat my head against the wall right now, Kyle just mentioned wanting to be able to be here to hold and kiss me. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Why can’t this boy take a hint!? I’m not so sure turning him down nicely is working out" August 12, 2009

"Nine things about myself:
1. I love my eyes.
2. Even though I suck, I enjoy soccer very much, and I am defiantly planning on getting better.
3. I can't reach the top hook of locker :(
4. I sometimes watch disney. And this started recently.
5. I dream of having his last name (:
6. If I could have any drawing ability, I'd love to take art class. To bad I don't.
7. I would be lost without a book and my ipod.
8. I Should be a sophomore .
9. I wish I went to church." August 13, 2009

"So some things have happened since you last spoke to me. Like the fact that I am a single woman." September 21, 2009

"Before he left we were just hugging on each other, and I told him he wasn't getting anything else then, so he just kissed me on the fore head . . . It was kind of sweet, you had to be there. ha.
but yeah . . . I know you have a comment Meg, so I'll just stop now til I see it ;)" September 30, 2009

"Then, in math I just didn't feel like talking or doing anything, I just hurried with my work and laid my head down. I didn't even want to sleep. While I was doing this though I listened to the bad kids talk about getting high and there probation officers. One had an ankle bracelet on. Pretty interesting." November 8, 2009


"The Single Life
Okay, so it's not exactly "the single" life, more like the "it's complicated" life.
Why must everything be complicated in life? Why can't anything every be easy? The best of things always have their downsides.


Facebook
Possibly, my new best friend. Yes, sad." November 23, 2009

"I'm probably like everyother typical teenage girl, with an occasional difference.
I'm a fan of facebook, texting, and Twilight. Edward Cullen is my dream man, with a little bit of Jacob on the side.
Where some don't understand/ like Bella, I do. I feel she could understand me, unlike anyone else, if she was real of course. And yes, I realize, as a fictional character she is meant to be that way . . but still." November 25, 2009


"Happy 17th birthday (:
I hope it had a turn for the better, you truely deserve it more than anyone I know. I wish I knew more people like you Megs. Stay happy, because your depressed post make me sad!
You are my blogger idol, my big sister, my best mormon friend [ :) ], a header-making Queen, a great person at heart, and the only person I know who has a life sized Taylor Lautner in there bedroom. That my friend, is plenty to be happy and feel special about.
Think of all the great things all your other friends have to say, and all the more things I could say.
And yes, this would be obnoxiously big if blogger would let me, but for some reason won't. :)
-Jamie" November 27, 2009

"Buddy the Elf; What's your favorite color?" November 27, 2009

"Boys. Oh sweet, sweet boys. How I love you so." November 28, 2009

"For the first time in eleven months and twelve days, I feel . . . single. It feels . . . odd, but okay." November 30, 2009

"Ugh, the thought of the future, even the word, is making me want to puke. Or maybe that's just the sickness coming back? Maybe he is the sickness. My emotional self is sick, so my physical self is sick? He'd like that; it being about him." December 1, 2009


"Jamie
Yeah, I know.


So,a girl like me, would or wouldn't make the cut?


10:02pmBrian
i dont know....would you?


10:03pmJamie
I think so" - December 6, 2009

"He likes me. He said so himself. Score."- December 7, 2009


"Ahh, the Brian thing.


Well, I never actually met Brian before last week. He had added me on facebook, and via Facebook chat I asked him who he was. He ended up not knowing me, but he did go to my school. That night we talked for an hour, and mostly everyday since, besides the weekend, we've talked a few hours on facebook.
Like I said, he goes to my school, a senior. He's on cross country, and he's kinda short haha. A little taller than me. That's okay though, he's really nice (: Megan, if you knew him, you'd aprove.


Anyways, evenually I found this liking for him. And long story short, he told me he liked me too (:
For now, he's my friend, but there's potential. :)" December 8, 2009


"Girls and drama. It sounds so horrible together, yet goes so well. Who likes it anyways? Why don't we all just write our feelings in blogs . . ." December 10, 2009


"As for that other boy, Brian, I had an awkward day yesterday. For 4th block, Cross country had to come sit in the class room with soccer. That's an hour and a half ladies and gents.
Well, We probably spoke a total of six minutes, and that was at the very in. Atleast half the class, I was within five feet of him. I kept looking at him, and as I looked away I could see him looking at me. Or maybe I imagined that? Half of the class he was reading and listening to his Ipod, then he was playing cards. We shared randon glances and smiles a few times, and finally I used the opportunity to say "Hi." with my nervous smile. I'm sure my face was friend . . . At least my friends said it was. I could feel it. He smiled and said "Well, hi." and there on he was actually very talkative. The bell rang and we had to say our goodbyes.
Maybe he was just waiting for me to say something?? Who knows. When I got home, we talked for about three hours on facebook.
It would be so much easier if I could just read that boys mind. Heck, all boys while we are at it. Agreed? Thank you." December 10, 2009


"Facebook Chat
Brian
well.... =) today i asked out anna brown =) and she said yes =) so that made my day amazing =) so thats interesting =)


5:00pmJamie
interesting, yes." December 11, 2009


"So, today I just realized just how stupid I am. I was actually going to date Kyle, because he has wanted me too for months. Of course him and his sucky timing, he just got back with Amy. This is what? The 23435 time he's got with her, or not left her, while he's telling me he wants to be with me and likes me more.
Me+boys= never going to work out. Ugh." December 14, 2009


"A-rah A-ray Here's a post about today (:
Do you not just love how that rhymed? Yes, I must say, I have skills. Not. Today was one of those days where when you lay in bed that night you think. "Wow, today was a good day."
It started out at the dreaded hour of six. I was tired, or course, and my memories of it were somewhat of a blur. I do remember coming into Spanish late, due to my Mother's lack of ability to find cloths. We soon started our exam, which was exceptionally easy. I made a 113 out of 115. I was happy. Then, I had Algebra. Guess you didn't miss a single problem on her exam? Jamie. Guess who was the best grade in her class? Jamie. Heck Yeah. I was happy.
I should've left school at eleven, but didn't. I thought this would ruin the happy, but didn't. As I walked the almost empty halls to 3rd block, I realized that I actually liked that class when we weren't doing work. At first I talked to Spenser. He's awesome haha. Him and I have a secret handshake. Yes, we are that cool. I spoke a little to Garrick, trying to be super nice. Yesterday, he convinced to Spenser and I that he had given up on love. I felt bad for him :( He's very open on the fact that he likes me, so it sometimes makes trying to be nice awkward. He has good intentions though. After this I went and hung out at Coach Porter's desk and played some game on the computer with her and Devyn. I was having a good time, and then something even better happened. A announcement come on over the intercom saying on the bell, all high school students who were eating lunch report to the cafeteria. You see, I normally have last lunch, which is obviously no fun. So first lunch, was awesome! None of my usually crowd was there, so I found a nice little seat with Roslyn, Staci, Deni, and Cameron. I wasn't very talkive for some reason. But, it was fine. Brian was in the cafe, and I had passed him with out saying a word. The second time I passed he said something along the lines of "Why didn't you say hey?" and of course I replied with "Well, why didn't you?" It followed with about a minutes worth of pointless conversation, that made me shamelessly giddy inside. I don't even know why really, but it's nice. It helped the happiness." December 18, 2009


"Oh my, I want to live in Utah. It sounds perfect to me. I love the morals, the innocents, the atmosphere, the pretty boys, all of it.
Cute Mormon family, adopt me. I prefer to live in Pleasant Grove, but anything in okay." December 28, 2009


"Ha. I just googled someone, and I actually found something legit. I thought it was funny. You should try it some times (:" January 1, 2010


"Since New Years is my favorite holiday, and is usually awaited, it seems a little unrealistic that it's here.
For most people, New Years is the time for a New start. Now, I realize that you can't just start over the moment the clock hits twelve. I do however, find it encouraging. I like to imagine there's hope for change in anything my heart desires. I like to imagine it's a new start for myself.
It's the one time the year that I can assure you I will not be pessimistic about any(most) situations." January 2, 2010


"2010; New Decade
It's here. A new decade. Ten years ago, I was in Kindergarten. I still remember those days . . . I started it in Alabama, I was born there. I had this best friend named Callie who I had been best friend's for as long as I can remember. She lived two or three houses down. We even went to day care/preschool together. I have quite a couple memories of times with her. She would come over to my house, and we would play on my swing set, and sometimes ride our tricycles in my carport. I remember coming inside and my mom making us Mac & Cheese. For some reason, we would share what was on our underwear, and we found it very fascinating that Santa had brought us both Rugrats underwear. Aaah . . . Those were the days. (: I was even the k-3rd Harvest Queen at my school. Cool, eh?
But then, we moved to Tennessee. When we lived in Alabama, my grandparent's (dad's side) use to live next door. They had moved to Tennessee. Then my aunt died in a car crash, and I hear it was hard on my Dad. I think that was one of the reasons we moved, but hey I was five, I'm not completely sure. So, we moved. I guess we were at the end of Kindergarten, since I have a year book, but not completely sure. In all, I was in three different schools that year.
I'm pretty sure I just started to ramble, but my point was going to be ten years may seem a long time, but really, it's not.
Ten years holds a lot of memories, that will eventually be over before you know it. It makes you think to cherish time, and not to wish it away. It makes me realize that even thought It goes by faster than some may think, a lot can happen, a lot can change. I mean, sure I was five and it may not completely count, but I would have never thought I would be where I was today. Living in Tennessee, divorced parents, a little brother, a grade behind, dating (or not, I don't even know) who I'm or have dated." January 2, 2010


"Today I went to Famous Daves, and our waiter was smoking; smoking hot. He had this whole Lumber Jack thing going on with his hair and facial hair. If you look past that being rather strange, you'd find him sexy."January 11, 2010


"Once upon a time, there was a girl.
She wasn't a princess, or an unhappy step child, and she surely wanted to be neither.


Sure, she had her times when she felt just as lucky as that princess, and times when she felt as low as that unhappy step child.


She was just your average girl though.
She had hopes and dreams; She had doubts and fears; She had secrets and desires.


As of now, there isn't much to her story, and what there is is only the beginning. The beginning of the beginning really.


Shall we say, Chapter one? Chapter two? Heck, maybe even chapter three, but all in all, whatever the case is, it doesn't have much importance.


The beginning of her story was never told, leaving the rest destined to be unheard. What good story has never been told? Defiantly not any that I've heard.


So from this point on, her story will be told, from the one and only possible author.


Herself.


She shall tell her story through written words inspired by every aspect that only every girl has. She shall also hold it close to her, for her story in sacred.


Maybe for her eyes only even?


She may choose.
It's what she thinks.
It's what she does.
It's who she tells.
It's who she trust.
It's what she dreams.
It's what she desires.
It's what she fears.
It's hers.
It's her Unspoken Words From the Heart." January 11, 2010

"Hello March. I have plans for you." March 1, 2010


"My blog as became a place for statements, rather than post. So would you like to read a new statement?


I'm hoping the whole "One door closes, another door opens" things is positive. I feel as if I am now on a new chapter, and I'm sitting on the edge of my sit waiting for what I'll read next. I know not too many people read my blog, but I'm requesting you to wish me luck, in your mind or comments. Either is fine. I'd appreciate it." March 8, 2010


"What enjoyment to people get out of trying to ruin a good thing? Especially when that good thing is something your "friend" has.
Yesterday, my so called friend goes off and twist my words and then tells me the person she told was just getting on her nerves so she was trying to make her mad. If you want to make a person mad, is it really necessary to throw your friend under the bus and put words in her mouth. Then, admit, you were just annoyed and said it. How immature can you get?


THEN. The day after, after you had a talk with the so called friend about how what they did was wrong, they go off and tell what they SWORE not to tell.


gehhhhhhhfnkaverpf9u4wedfh98cvhrnbvpf9vghnetbvphnfuivaekrlgvp0r8ivnlregkv98nrebv8r9ea


I was having a great day too. Thanks for ruining it person." March 11, 2010


"Brian . . . the current boyfriend. We've been together for a short amount of time, but I really like him. I'm starting to think more and more that I made the right decision. He's a senior at my school, but he's not really the typical guy. He is really sweet, you all would like this boy. The first time we went out was last Friday. We went to Logan's, walked around the mall, and to the movies. Since then, he's met my mom and she really likes him. I met his mom too, which I hear said I was sweet (I sure hope so) and she was really nice. She seemed like a cool mom (: He takes me home from school, which I really enjoy, and we've taken a good amount of trips to sonic haha You gotta love chapel hill, sonic is the hot spot. Oh, we also go "running", which really consist of walking with a seldom jog. We are suppose to be really running on Monday, I don't know if I'm dreading it or excited yet. Anyways . . . I think the point of this was that I like him. He has nice potential (: Oh- Like I mentioned, he's a senior, and that means Prom. I'm not really sure how I feel about that either, but hey how many girls in my grade get a chance to go to prom? So . . . yeah. Comment?" March 12, 2010


"So it seems I have met a boy who could do some serious damage to my heart. Maybe, I'm just delusional. Yes, that is probably it. I kind of like it though, so I'll accept it." March 21, 2010


"Dear You,
After telling you my secret today,
I hoped with all my heart you wouldn't tell.
I hope I truly can trust you, as the friend I hope I have.


Dear You,
You're possibly my sister at heart.
My respect for you is through the roof.
I could learn so many things from you,
just as you could from me.
Like sisters.
If only you lived close by.


Dear You,
My mind is constantly going with thoughts concerning you.
I wonder what you really think of me.
I wonder if you'll extend from the present, into the future.
Oh, and I love it when you sing in the car (:" March 25, 2010


"It's weird how things worked out though. It seems everything that was once there, was gone, and I was left to start over." April 13, 2010


"Oh, and I've decided I want to be a Gleek." May 18, 2010


"Say hello to my 2004 Jeep Grand Cherokee.
She has leather, tinted windows, heated seats, and a sun roof.
She's pretty awesome.
I love her." June 7, 2010

Consider yourself filled in with my passed year of blogging!

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